OVERCOMING THE SPIRIT OF OFFENSE

by Evangelist Garlena L. Hines

“More over if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone…"
Matthew 18:15

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So you’ve been offended.  Someone said something that was true and it hurt.  Someone spoke to an undisciplined area in your life and your flesh kicked against it.  Or someone said something hurtful to you that really damaged you.  Two things we need to know about being offended. 

• Whenever you are offended, look at the person who’s offended you.  If they have a history of being mean, cruel and offensive then maybe you were just another target.  Try the spirit by the Spirit.  If you know it’s not their intention to do something mean or to hurt anyone intentionally, then take that into consideration before you become offended unnecessarily.

• Different offenses deem for different healing periods.  There are some things people may say to you and because of the relationship you have with them and what they said, they only bruise you.  Then there were times when things were said and because of the closeness you had with that individual what was said, you were deeply wounded.  If this is the case with you, take time to heal that you may restore/reconcile the relationship if desired. 

Even as I write this article, I want to be transparent with you in hopes that someone will be healed from the spirit of offense.  I am struggling with the spirit of offense due to a very painful situation I encountered earlier this year.  The incident caused me great embarrassment, pain, and was very devastating.  A friend of mine mishandled my pain by exposing my situation to others, who did not have a need to know.  You know the saying,….everyone has a friend, who has a friend.  By the time the story was released it was very vicious and hurtful.  In addition, because my friend could not understand my pain, she criticized my process of healing rather then understanding I needed to be healed.   

When I was younger we had a rhyme that said “sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me”.  What a spirit of deception.  We all know that words hurt.  The words said to me by this friend caused me to shut down and create a “defense mechanism”.  Somehow I feel it keeps me in a place of feeling safe from hurting again. Not true! There are times when my friend will call and I become very panicky and nervous.  Many times I won’t answer the phone because the pain continues to erupt and I don’t want my pain to cause her pain.  My prayer NOW is God “heal the brokenness inside”.  So how do we handle it when someone offends us??

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